Olivia Munn’s Hawaii Bikini Pictures
How could you not dig Olivia Munn? You would have to be two shades of retarded not to think that Olivia Munn is a pretty groovy gal. Besides the fact that she looks good in a two-piece bikini, but she seems to know what the boys like, and has no problems giving it to them, as evidence by these bikini pictures of our Gal Geek taken in Hawaii and posted on her blog HeyOlivia, which I’m assuming is what she hears a lot at nerd conventions, probably followed by, “…will you go home to meet my mom? She doesn’t believe we’re dating!” These bikini pics were posted under the title of “First batch of Hawaii Photos”, which means there are more to come. Joy joy!
Hot Girls with Ugly Tattoos of the Day: Megan Fox
Megan Fox apparently woke up one day and said to herself, “Self, you know what would look good on you? A big ol honkin’ tattoo of Marilyn Monroe’s face on the inside of one of your arms! Yes, just one, because two would be overkill! And oh yeah, how about some fancy schmancy words and such tattooed all across your body? Man, that’ll show people who thinks you’re just a pretty face and burgeoning sex Goddess!” Okay, so maybe that wasn’t how it happened, but you gotta admit, it had to be something equally silly like that for a girl this good looking to become so addicted to some Godawful tattoos. What’s next, Angelina Jolie’s big puffy lips on her forehead? Ooops, better not give her ideas!
Minka Kelly Makes a Case for Failed TV, Is Really Hot
So according to some online material I might have stumbled across once or twice (heck, I might have even made a mention of it here, but, you know, I sorta have forgotten) Minka Kelly’s TV show Friday Night Lights is back on the air. As I recall, it’s on Direct TV or some such, which basically means if few people saw it when it was on NBC, even fewer people will see it now that it’s on paid satellite TV. So what does it all mean? Well, who knows, what am I, Nostradamus? But what I do know is that there is a very damn good reason for keeping Friday Night Lights on TV, and that reason is named Minka Kelly. Yes, Minka Kelly. The little cheerleader minx on the show. What, you’ve never seen it? Take a gander at this old appearance in Men’s Health and then go find the first season or Friday Night Lights. Hey, it beats Golden Girls reruns, right?
Latin Flavor of the Day: Suelyn Medeiros
According to official reports (aka her Myspace page), our Latin Flavor of the Day Suelyn Medeiros is a 22-year old brunette bombshell Brazil, but she currently calls Florida, California, and New York her home base of operations. Says the 22-year old sex Goddess: “Being happy doesn’t mean everything’s perfect. It means you’ve decided to see beyond the imperfections.” Obviously that’s easy for Suelyn Medeiros to say, being that she’s pretty close to perfect, big, luscious booty and plump lips being major bonuses. Continues Suelyn: “Life is to short and I want to make the best out of it.” That’s how I live my life, too, except I tend to procrastinate a lot and don’t do a whole lot from 9 a.m. to 7 p.m., but other than that, we’re, like, soul mates or something!
Geek Fantasy Girl of the Day: Rhona Mitra
I bet when Rhona Mitra started this whole acting thing she probably didn’t figure she’d become the object of geek boys everywhere. Oh sure, she’s done her share of “quality” TV (whatever that is), but let’s face it, fanboys everywhere are drooling over Rhona Mitra for roles like “Beowulf”, “Doomsday”, and the upcoming “Underworld” prequel. And of course, there are her days as the Lara Croft model. Okay, so maybe Rhona Mitra probably figured she was going to become the object of lust for game geeks everywhere when she slipped on the shorts and started waving fake handguns around, I could be wrong. It’s been known to happen. So here’s a sampling of Rhona Mitra’s past works worthy of geek love.
Wash Away Your Post-Holiday Monday Blues with Caitlin Manley
Oh my, wasn’t that a great holiday weekend? Or weekends, as is the case with some of you? Yup, it sure was fun for me, too. Got myself a lot of presents, drank a lot of booze, and even managed to pick up a drunk woman or two at the bar. Just kidding. I didn’t get a lot of presents. Anyhoo. Here’s some Caitlin Manley to wash away that post-holiday Monday blues that you’re feeling right now. Who is Caitlin Manley, you ask? She’s a lingerie model, which means she wears very little clothes when people are taking pictures of her. And that, dear sirs, is exactly what you need. Trust me on this one, I’m never wrong about this stuff. Well, except for that one time in July 2002…
Centro Commercials Posit Santa Claus as a Hip Metrosexual Douche Bag
You know what I hated about Christmas? Oh sure, the presents and joy to the world stuff were pretty rad, as my nephews would say, but the commercials. I especially hate those series of “hip” Santa Claus commercials for the Centro phone, where they turned St. Nick into a skinny metrosexual douche bag who texts on his Centro cellphone and spins records at parties via a chimney. Hey, it’s not like I’m a traditionalist or anything, and it’s not like ol St. Nick is even real, but the “try so hard it’s painful” level of these commercials are downright embarrassing. But hey, see for yourself. If you agree with me, you rock, and if you don’t, eh, go jump off a bridge.
Let’s Catch Some More Alejandra Cata
The last time we posted Alejandra Cata, it was such a resounding success (meaning some people actually bothered to leave a comment on the post, which is, like, a major success for us, being that we’re a pretty pathetic website and whatnot), so of course we’re going to push our luck and make another Alejandra Cata posting, this time with the lovely lingerie model in nothing but swimwear. Yes, even some bikini shots, too, because that’s just how cool we are. Don’t believe us? Just ask your Uncle Rob. He’ll tell you how awesome cool we are, and if he doesn’t, then he’s a lying piece of shit, and I told you never to talk to Uncle Rob. He likes to touch kids inappropriately and such. Anyhoo, catch some Alejandra Cata.
Dania Ramirez in Maxim
Sorry, lovers of gorgeous Latinas, it doesn’t look like Dania Ramirez will be back anytime soon on the NBC show Heroes. At least, that’s what it’s looking like, with her character having been stripped of her power and gone back to wherever it was the character came from. Which is a bloody dang shame, as Heroes had the goofy Japanese guy and all those white folks, but not a whole lot of color otherwise. Dania Ramirez sure brought a whole lot of color, as well as mucho hotness. Here she is in Maxim magazine, reminding us just how much we’ll miss her on the show. Maybe she’ll end up on something on the WB or CW or whatever the hell it’s being called nowadays.
Sports Babe of the Day: Lilian Garcia
As I am wont to do, I spent a lot of time trying to figure out if the wrestling divas are actually athletes, or more like models-slash-actors. And of course by “a lot of time” I mean I just went through the pro and cons a few seconds ago, and have decided, yes, I think the wrestling divas do qualify as athletes, and thus, they belong in our Sports Babe of the Day. Because, you know, I know people stay up late at nights waiting for me to make this very important decision, so here it is. Anyways, our Sports Babe of the Day is one Lilian Garcia, a ring announcer for the WWE brand who occasionally puts down the microphone to kick some ass. You go, girl.
Your New Years Hangover Special with Hilary Duff
I can see it now: “Coming in 2010, from the same geniuses who convinced Anne Hathaway to take her top off in “Havoc” so she’ll be taken more seriously as an actress in Hollywood, comes “Havoc 3″, starring Hilary Duff like you’ve never seen her before!” Now just add in that Movie Guy’s voice, some ’70s-ish porn music, and you got yourself the biggest selling movie of all time, starring Hilary Duff, with nary a crappy pop song to be found anywhere in the soundtrack. But instead of Latin gangbangers, Hilary will be taking it off for, like, some Aryan Nation scumbag or something. Yeah, yeah, I know it’s never going to happen. Or at least, not happen anytime soon. (I’m just optimistic that way.) But anyways, here are some special Hilary Duff hotness, outtakes, as far as I can tell, from her recent triumphant return to Maxim.
Kristen Bell’s Bikini Welcomes You Back
Yeah, yeah, I know I said I wouldn’t be posting again until the new year, but you know what? Some things just can’t wait. One of those things are pictures of Kristen Bell in a two-piece bikini looking, as the kids would say, all hot and shit. As a fan of Kristen Bell bikini pictures, I can tell you that you don’t run across these very often. Okay, so maybe you do run across them quite often, as our little Kristen Bell is not exactly the shy kind. You saw a heck of a lot of her in a bikini in “Forgetting Sarah Marshall”, and you’re guaranteed to see more of her in a bikini in her new movie, a romantic comedy called “Couples Retreat”. Yep, that’s right: Kristen Bell is so cool, she did a couple of crappy romantic comedies just so you could go see her in the movie theater, while telling your imaginary girlfriend from Canada that you’re actually treating her to a chick flick! Oh, Kristen, is there nothing you won’t do for us men?
Your Christmas Send-off: Jessica Jane Clement
This year’s Christmas send-off is courtesy of Jessica Jane Clement, whose name keeps making me think I’m supposed to add the words “adult film actress” before her name. But don’t you try to pin that on our Jessica Jane Clement, because she’s no adult film star, even though she does have the body and face for it. Nope. Jessica Jane Clement is very much a legitimate actress and model, and if she ever has need to take it all off for the sake of a few bucks, may I suggest giving me a call? My production of “How can I get Jessica Jane Clement to take her clothes off” has been on hold for way too long as it is. Anyhoo, Merry Christmas, you bastards. We’ll see you back here next year.
Extra Lingerie Goodness with Ana Cunha
Oh, Brazil, will you ever run out of hot lingerie models to give to the world? Gosh, I sure hope not! Where else would we go for our weekly dose of hot lingerie models if not for Brazil? Girls such as Ana Cunha? Yes, it’s true, if not for Brazil, we might be spending our time posting pictures of, like, exotic rocks from beaches around the world or something, and that would just suck so much I might have to put myself in the garbage disposal after the third or fourth week. Yes, it sucks that much. But luckily for us, we won’t have to go to such extremes, because Brazil continues to produce women like Ana Cunha. In the future, if there was a war, can we make sure nothing happens to Brazil? Just a thought.
Adriana Lima’s Bra is Indeed Very Miraculous
Ah, Victoria’s Secret. Every kid’s first skin mag, before they actually grew up, got a job, and finally, after years of practice, got the nerve to walk into that Hindu convenience store and pick up their very first brown paper-covered copy, making sure not to look the Hindu guy behind the counter in the eyes as you paid for it, lest you be judged. Until that magical day, there was Victoria’s Secret’s catalogs to keep us occupied. Now that we’ve grown up, it takes more than a catalog to satiate us. How about some TV commercials? That’ll work. Llike this one, starring Adriana Lima in the new Victoria’s Secret miracle bra. What’s so miracle about this particular bra, you ask? Um, the girl wearing it, for one. Here’s the new miracle bra commercial with Adriana Lima, plus a bonus behind-the-scenes of the shoot just cause I’m a nice guy that way.
Latin Flavor of the Day: Ana Carmen Leon
I haven’t a clue who Ana Carmen Leon is, but man, ain’t she flavorful? See, there’s a reason she fits perfectly in this category, although to be fair, we’re talking about hypotheticals here. Hypothetically, Ana Carmen Leon does sound like a Latin name; and hypothetically, Ana Carmen Leon is very attractive to look at, especially in her undies as she’s in in these pictures. Other than that, there’s nothing on the net that would even prove that Ana Carmen Leon actually exists — except, you know, she showed up one day for a photoshoot in Urbe Bikini magazine. And ’sides, since when have we allowed the questionable existence of a woman to deter us from ogling some gorgeous pics of her? And so, commence your ogling, gentlemen.
Brit Babe of the Day: Melanie Slade
Our Brit Babe of the Day is Melanie Slade, the girlfriend of English soccer player Theo Walcott, who I hear is a pretty good soccer player, or footballer as they call it over there. Then again, I hear lots of things, and most of them turn out not to be true. That’s the problem with listening to that voice in your head that people keep telling me doesn’t really exist, but I insist it does, and it even has a name and everything. Why would an imaginary voice have a name if it didn’t exist? Exactly my point. Anyhoo, here’s some Melanie Slade, who recently showed upon the pages of a foreign version of FHM. What qualifies as a “foreign” version? Basically anything that doesn’t have letters I can pronounce.
Your Weekend Send-off: Ali Larter in Obsessed
Your weekend send-off is courtesy of Ali Larter’s skanky secretary. Or at least, the character she plays in the new movie “Obsessed”, set to open next year or thereabouts. In the flick, Larter plays a temp secretary who realizes that her very married boss is a good catch, so goes about seducing him. When that doesn’t work, she tries to get the boss’ wife, played by singer Beyonce jealous with some mind games. Along the way, the dorky Jerry O’Connell shows up to answer phones or something. Anyways, here are some choice shots of Larter from “Obsessed”. Don’t start getting all slobbery, kids, these are probably the most risque pictures from the movie, as the film is rated PG-13, which means it’ll have as much actual nudity and sex as your average Lifetime TV Movie of the Week starring some ex-sitcom chick getting beaten by her abusive husband. By the way, if you watch the trailer, they already showed you the ending, so, er, no need to see the movie now!
Jason Statham Agrees: Natalie Martinez is Hot
If you saw tough guy Jason Statham’s remake of “Death Race”, you might have have noticed Natalie Martinez. You know, the really hot chick in the black crop top who walks around the movie like she owns the place? That’s model turned actress turned the object of men’s prison fantasies Natalie Martinez. And it’s not just us who agree that the Cuban hottie is a real hottie, either. Jason Statham, in this special feature video from the “Death Race” DVD, totally agrees. Methinks Jason’s had a couple of nights where he wondered what Natalie Martinez did off the set, if you know what I mean, and I think you do. Wink wink, and all that junk.
Anahi Gonzales Bikini Madness
If looking good in a bikini was a crime, Peruvian model Anahi Gonzales would be sentenced for life. Or maybe just 30 years, give or take a couple of nice judges who doesn’t fault her for being born hot. But hey, this is a free world, so being hot just means you get to work a couple of days a week and get paid obscene amount of money to turn men on and convince them they should buy lingerie and bikini for their girlfriends, even though said girlfriends probably wouldn’t look nearly as good as Anahi Gonzales and friends. Ah, the sweet life of an internationally known model, what could be better? What’s that, Tracy? You say you want to grow up to be a doctor? You silly, silly girl. Now go into the bathroom and throw up before you get too fat, fatty.
